Black Women I Wish Were Gay (or Just Come Out, Already) Part Deux

This is a Rant so be prepared.

There are only a few Lesbian Websites that I visit with any regularity and one of them is AE.  I don’t visit too much because as of late, the content has been a little lack luster.  I’ll mosey on over every other day and find something that I like to read, something inspiring, something about a Queer woman of color, or amazing list of books I absolutely must read this summer.  Wednesday was no different, I found a sweet article about Dyke Fashion (cut off shorts are back!) Did they ever go away?  (No)  and my favorite would-be lesbo, Queen Latifah article about her recent Upscale Magazine cover.  Here’s the AE Link. Hopefully you can read all of the silly comments behind mine.

Sorry you have to cut and paste but hopefully you did.  I mean, am I crazy or is it not important for Black Queer Visibility for these women to come out?!  I mean, come on!  I totally get that what you do behind your closed doors is your business but the importance of celebrity, possibly the most important thing about celebrity is the visibility.  I’m not a Black Pride, Down with the Man black woman.  As much as my father tried to make me, I’m not.  I’m in love with a Jew (which is better than white yet in some cases not, right?)  I mean, really.  But as a black woman who will be raising black jewish children seeing a face that you can recognize is important.

I don’t relate to all black people, I never have and I never will.  I don’t like it all the time when people refer to me as “sister”  on the train (mainly because they’re leering men and I find it disturbing)  I never ever quite had as much rhythm as I’m “supposed” to have and I don’t, under any circumstance, think that all black people are the same but we’re not.  There is something to be said, though, about the recognition of blackness around you.

Did I vote for Barack Obama because he’s a black man?  No.  In my opinion he’s mixed race but in this race-obssessed world he’s black.  I do, however, feel a sense of pride in knowing that he’s a black man and my president.  I would feel the same pride if Senator Clinton had won the nomination and inevitably one the presidency.

On the same token, do I feel a kinship with Ellen or Margaret, yes but when Wanda Sykes came out I was overjoyed and overcome with a sense of happiness and pride.  Unfortunately, the responders of my post are white women, and the majority of them are under 25.  Such naivety, and so much growing to do.  As much as we like to pretend that it doesn’t exist, racism, sexism, classism, homophobia, anti-Semitism is very much alive in our country.  Unfortunately with the election of our president it’s on the rise.

The tagline for After Ellen is “Visibility Matters”  Google “Famous Black Gay People” and tell me what you come up with.  I’ll wait.  First hit is the Black Voices list of 29?  Notice anything about the women??  There are a handful of black women mentioned-mostly all men.  A large amount of the black women have passed away, may all of their souls rest in peace.  Now, google Famous Gay People.  Famous and Gay is the first website with an alphabetized list of 700 famous gays.  Granted there are black folks in their too, but really?  Can you really not see the importance of Black Gay Female Visibility, people!?  Am I alone here?

8 thoughts on “Black Women I Wish Were Gay (or Just Come Out, Already) Part Deux

  1. Excellent piece of writing there – and yes it is definitely important for black people to come out too.. 37 countries on the african continent criminalise homosexuality – I could rant for miles.

  2. True, it is important but maybe, just maybe, they’re too scared to out themselves. Being black and gay “Lawd come down” as my stepmom put it.
    he I feel like coming out!
    I’m black and gayyyyyyy!

    • Coming out is extremely hard, I don’t disagree. My parents STILL like to call my homosexuality a phase or tell me that I’m not or refuse to talk about it. I try not to be in their faces about it but whenever I can I slip it in because they’ve got to come to terms with it. When Wanda came out my mom was all, “NO WAY!” YES WAY, Mom, and know what? It’s OKAY!!

  3. in a global sense, as noble as the fight may be, i can totally get that a whole bunch of black people do not, will not come out – because the consequences for them are dire – curative rape, beatings, murder, police … etc etc. and i am not in their shoes … and to be honest, i have no clue what it’s like/how hard it is to be black in the usa or any first world country either.

    • In many countries coming out is punishable by law. There’s a woman, who’s name escapes me know, from a middle eastern country just granted refuge in the UK otherwise if she were deported back home she’d surely be put to death. It’s definitely an issue of safety. Even in the US. For celebrities, though, it’s quite different. I mean, it’s still an uncertainty but the status of celebrity in the US is such that if they do it then it must be okay. It’s a quite interesting phenomenon.

  4. Oh I have no time or sympathy for celebrities in closets, none at all. And there, tbh, I don’t discriminate – I just plain think that every single moneylovin one of them should come out. And that no fucker should treat it like it’s a crime. I saw elizabeth taylor twittered that whoever outed michael jackson – that he had better pray for gods forgiveness. And I thought jeez what – the truth is now a sin? Argh.

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