Ode to Straight Girls

I feel For you, Straight Girl. I really, really do.

Okay, I was going to try to come up with a clever little rhyme that would be all sweet and funny and quirky and clever and then I realized that I’m a blogger and novelist because I can’t write anything that even vaguely resembles a poem. I know poems don’t necessarily have to rhyme but I like them too. I’m off the subject.

Straight Girls.

Don’t worry-I don’t have another straight girl crush. I did, however, spend an insightful evening with a handful of straight girls on Saturday Night and after walking away feeling empowered and refreshed from all of the girl on girl bonding it occurred to me that they really have it bad.

I can hear the lesbian bloggers now-They have it bad? How is that possible. Then you’ll rattle off a list of how it’s much easier on a straight girl than it is on a gay one. I know and I agree. I’m talking about this particular group of straight girls and some other straight ones that I know. I’ll start with my cousin to help paint the picture.

My Cousin Vanessa is a doctor. She’s not just any doctor she’s the head of anesthesia for a children’s hospital in Maryland. She owns her own home as well as her mother’s. She owns two expensive cars. She has season tickets to the Wizards (so good that when my cousin Kenny took a date they were only 2 rows up from the Obamas) She’s also is a season ticket holder for the Baltimore Ravens. She takes trips to places like Africa, Egypt, and the Caribbean and stays in the most lavish of resorts and spas. Last time she visited me in NYC she took Mirs and I to a restaurant over looking the park with $30 Martinis-just because she likes the view. Besides all of these things-she’s incredibly down to earth. She has an infectious laugh and she’s the least pretentious woman you’d ever meet. Looking at her-you’d have no clue what she’s worth.
She’s Single.


Saturday night Mirs and I are at a Tapas potluck dinner hosted by our friend, Allison. We were surrounded by these women; these highly intelligent, well-educated, well-traveled, creative, inventive amazing women. Some how the discussion turned to men. They weren’t complaining-just observing the limited dating pool of men. We were discussing how it was hard to find a man who’s not only, dare we say it, worthy of women of such stature but an equal. A man who has the same achievements as these women aren’t non-existent. Rather, they aren’t readily available to these women.

It’s been said for ages and I’ll say it again-Men are threatened and deathly afraid of talented, successful and educated women. The eldest of our group commented that she was sure that there were men of her age who were just as educated, talented, etc. as she-so why was it so hard for her to

Another’s response-He wouldn’t want her. She’s too smart, too well-traveled, too opinionated and frankly, too old. A man who’s an equal wouldn’t necessarily want a woman who wasn’t dependant on him. A man doesn’t want a woman who is smarter, funnier, more witty, more traveled. He most likely wants a woman who’s a bit dumber, a bit more dependent. A woman who’s quiet and not very opinionated, a woman who’ll be less-likely to steal his thunder.

The discussion came to a lull after we raged on for about 20 minutes and Mirs and I grinned at each other and touched hands.

“Well, ” I started. “You don’t really need a man, do you?”

They all had a laugh. Another friend commented that besides the fact that she does find women very attractive, it was the connecting with women on a deeper more spiritual level that she found the most alluring and attractive; it’s what draws her to other women. The rest of the group agreed.

We quickly got off of the subject of men and talked about the things that smart, witty, funny, creative women talk about. Our pitcher of Sangria dwindled into the night, as did the subsequent bottles of red and white wine. The evening was winding down but we weren’t quite ready to bid our farewells.

Just as we were considering leaving the door opened and Allison’s roommates returned with a Dude. Dude came in an said something funny aka-Stupid. Dude picked up a bamboo rod sitting in the corner and said something funny aka-stupid.

Dude sat on the edge of the couch and said , “So you’re having a Spanish night, eh? Hola! That’s what I can say in Spanish.”

“Do you speak any other languages?” A smart woman asked.

“Nah…” Dude playing with the stick.

Mais, bien sur” another smart woman responded.

Laughter among the women…Dude just, well looked dumb.

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2 thoughts on “Ode to Straight Girls

  1. Liked the blog… I understand what you mean my mother is one of those straight women and she is single. She also thinks there is no one out there on her level, so unfortunately she does not look… I think it is that way for lesbians as well. I mean there are o many that are educated and well traveled but it feels like finding a needle in a hay stack sometimes. To find that person that is on your level and down to earth. For me at least it feels like Im always choosing between the two.

  2. Thanks EC!
    I agree. It’s hard out there for single women period. I think that because we are so strong, strong willed and strong minded that it does make it a little bit more difficult to find a match. That said, it is sometimes for the best. It’s like those old heinz ketchup commercials from the late 80’s/early 90’s the best things are worth waiting for. i know that’s not the slogan but I don’t remember what it was, exactly!

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